Heading in the Right Direction

As this semester comes to a close, it’s time that I write my final learning blog! I find it insane that the fall semester of my sophomore year is basically over. Time moves almost too fast in college. And now I’m having trouble picking just one topic to blog about when it feels like I’ve learned so much! These past few months, I feel like I’ve experienced a great deal of personal growth. I’m finally starting to figure out my values and my goals for myself.

It hasn’t been easy. And I still don’t know everything about myself and where I’m headed in life – no one could possibly know that.  My dad especially has pushed me to begin thinking about my future, which is honestly strange. Not that my dad doesn’t care but he’s really not one to express opinions about my life. Growing up I was always very independent and made my own decisions. In high school, I chose all my classes, never asking for my parent’s opinion or help. I joined clubs and service organizations on my own without their encouragement. I figured out the college application process by myself, only really concerning them when I needed to pay an application fee. I didn’t even apply to my dad’s alma matter, Arizona State University. I think they wanted me to make my own decisions and think for myself. I was never some puppet child they could easily influence or control.

Obviously, my choices in high school paid off in the long run. I earned myself scholarships to multiple schools and many credit hours from taking AP classes. My parents were thrilled that I chose to attend TCU – it’s a great school and pretty close to home. Entering my freshmen year of college, though, I think my dad began to freak out about my independency. I declared Art History as my major – a field that he believes will not aid me in the future. Every time I speak with my dad, he proceeds to attack me with questions about my major, how I should look into other subjects, talk with advisors. On multiple occasions he has driven me to tears, making me feel as if I’m an idiot for choosing this degree plan.

I understand his concerns but I don’t feel like I’m setting myself up for failure. He obviously cares for me and wants the best for me. He’s said that I’m smart enough to do anything I like. He wants me to be able to support myself once I graduate, and not rely on him or anyone else to help me with money. I appreciate his concerns but the more he pushes me to reconsider my route, the more I seem to become convinced that I’m doing the right thing for me. I want to study something I enjoy and that will give me a fulfilling career that I am passionate about. Business will not make me happy, even if it may guarantee me a job.

The more my dad pesters me, though, the more I think about the future and what I need to accomplish to become successful in this major. I know that I will be attending some type of graduate school – either for a master’s in Art History or possibly law school. I’ve been researching internships and other opportunities that would give me experience. Although my dad’s concerns have been an annoyance, they have pushed me to prove him wrong and to think about the steps I need to take. Instead of listening to his criticisms and retreating from my passions, I’ve realized I can use them as motivation. It’s not that I want to prove my dad wrong, it’s that I want to show him what I can actually do with my major. I want to show him that there are opportunities out there for me if I go out and grab them.

I’ve found a role model in my older and similarly independent-minded brother. He’s been dreaming of working in the music industry since he was a teenager. In college he studied marketing but it’s his other experiences that really got his foot in the door. He worked for his college radio stations and interned for SXSW, a giant music and technology conference. His connections helped him earn a full-time job with SXSW. Although it took some time, he’s doing what he loves.

I’ve learned that at a certain point you need to take responsibility for your choices and trust your instincts. I know that the major I’ve chosen isn’t the easiest. I know I’ll need to work hard and make the right connections in order to find a job. In the end, though, I know that I’ll end up in a career that I’m passionate about.